2024 Tus sau: Harry Day | [email protected]. Kawg hloov kho: 2023-12-17 15:46
"Kuv tsis paub txawm tias koj tuaj yeem pab kuv. Kuv muaj cov teeb meem uas tsis muaj leej twg tuaj yeem pab kuv, tsis hais kuv yuav tig mus rau leej twg. " Nws yog nrog "kev tos txais" uas sib tham nrog cov neeg siv khoom ntawm Peb Lub Chaw qee zaum pib.
"Tam sim no koj puas tau khav theeb, thov kev pab, lossis yws yws txog qhov tsis muaj zog ntawm cov kws kho kev puas siab puas ntsws?" - Kuv nug feem ntau nrog tus phooj ywg luag ntxhi.
"Zoo, nws tau pom meej tias kuv thov kev pab," "thov" teb nrog pom tseeb "nruj" hauv nws lub suab.
"Zoo. Yam kev pab dab tsi koj thov tam sim no? " - Kuv nug txawm tias friendlier.
Thiab peb tuaj yeem hais tias los ntawm lub sijhawm ntawd peb txoj haujlwm sib koom pib. Peb yog sib koom. Thiab nws tsis yog ib txwm yooj yim thiab zoo siab rau tus neeg siv khoom nws tus kheej, tsis sib xws rau nws qhov kev cia siab thiab cov tswv yim.
Thiab ntawm no ib lo lus nug ntxiv tshwm sim: "Koj puas tau npaj tiag tiag los koom nrog qhov teeb meem no mus ib txhis?" Thiab, Kuv paub tseeb koj, tus neeg siv khoom cov lus teb tsis ib txwm muaj suab txaus ntseeg, txawm rau nws tus kheej.
Tau kawg, qee qhov teeb meem muaj kev paub lossis, ntau zaus ntau dua li, qhov txiaj ntsig thib ob tsis nco qab rau tus tswv-tus tswv nws tus kheej. Rau ib tus neeg, QHOV teeb meem ib zaug ntxiv hais txog qhov tshwj xeeb thiab tsis txawv ntawm nws tus cwj pwm, rau ib tus neeg, qhov muaj teeb meem ntawm SUCH ua rau lub siab ntsws tsis txaus ntawm lub neej, rau ib tus neeg qhov teeb meem no yog qhov laj thawj zoo los tham txog nws nrog cov tsav tsheb tavxij - kws txiav plaub hau - cov npoj yaig. Thiab txoj haujlwm ntawm "tus neeg raug tsim txom" tsis mob heev hauv kev koom nrog thov txim phooj ywg. Puas yog ib tus neeg uas muaj SUCH muaj teeb meem npaj los coj nws thiab muab nws tso? Tom qab ntawd yuav tshuav dab tsi?
Thiab seb tus kws kho kev puas siab ntsws, ua ke nrog tus neeg siv khoom, paub tias YUAV UA LI CAS tiag tiag yuav ua qhov teeb meem no tom qab daws nws, thiab kev ua tiav ntawm nws cov kev daws teeb meem nyob ntawm. Yog li, ntxiv rau kev tshem tawm qhov teeb meem, qee lub sijhawm xav tau rau cov neeg siv khoom kom tau siv rau txoj haujlwm ntawm "Tus Neeg Tsis Muaj Teeb Meem".
Xyaum cov kws kho kev puas siab puas ntsws paub tias ntau yam kev cov nyom uas cov neeg siv khoom tuaj yeem daws tau hauv ib lossis ob ntu. Tab sis cov rooj sib tham mus ib qho dhau ib qho, tab sis tsis muaj qhov tshwm sim. Vim li cas? Puas yog vim qee zaum kev sab laj dhau los ua "kev ua tsov rog" rau txoj cai los ua tus tswv SUCH muaj teeb meem?! Puas yog SUCH cov neeg siv khoom tau npaj txhij thiab "plam" rau tus kws paub txog kev puas siab ntsws uas xav txog nws tus kheej tuaj yeem daws tau hauv ob peb teev nws qhov nyuaj SUCH DIFFICULT, nrog uas nws twb tau tig mus rau txhua tus neeg paub nws tsis muaj txiaj ntsig?
Muaj ib lub hauv paus ntsiab lus zoo ntawm kev sab laj, uas yuav tsum tau ua ncaj ncees thiab ua tib zoo, thiab Nws lub npe yog "Yog li dab tsi?" Thiab, tiag tiag, yuav ua li cas yog qhov teeb meem no muaj ntau dua kaum ob xyoos? Yog li dab tsi yog tias tsis muaj leej twg tuaj yeem daws nws ua ntej? Yog li dab tsi yog tias ib tus neeg ib zaug hais tias THIS tsis raug "kho"? Yog tias ib tus neeg paub qhov ua rau muaj teeb meem, nws yog ib feem peb daws. Thaum nws pib paub txoj hauv kev ntawm kev daws teeb meem, tom qab ntawd nws twb tau daws los ntawm ob feem peb. Thiab dab tsi ua rau lwm thib peb? Yog lawm, Txoj kev nws tus kheej.
Tom qab tag nrho, los ntawm thiab loj, qhov teeb meem tsis yog tias ib tus neeg muaj teeb meem, tab sis hais tias nws tsis paub yuav daws nws li cas … lossis tsis xav paub / daws. Koj puas pom zoo?! Thiab yog tias ib tus neeg uas mob siab rau ua teeb meem tsis xav tso nws mus, qhov no txhais li cas?!
Peb yuav xav tias txhua yam teeb meem raug faib ua ob hom: "daws tau" thiab "daws tsis tau". Ntawm qhov "daws tsis tau" tsuas yog tus kheej tuag ntawm tus neeg nqa ntawm qhov teeb meem. Tag nrho lwm tus yog daws tau. Tsuas yog lawv, tig mus, tau muab faib ua ob hom: "cov uas ib tus neeg tau npaj los daws" thiab "cov uas nws tseem tsis tau npaj txhij los daws." Kuv vam tias koj pom zoo nrog qhov ntawd ib yam.
"Thiab, tiag tiag, yuav ua li cas yog qhov teeb meem no muaj ntau dua kaum ob xyoos? Yog li cas yog tias tsis muaj leej twg tuaj yeem daws nws ua ntej? Yuav ua li cas yog tias ib tus neeg ib zaug hais tias THIS" tsis kho "?"
Tau kawg, muaj xwm txheej uas siv sijhawm ntev los ua haujlwm nrog. Yog lawm, nws tsis tshua muaj nqis "hla" txhua qhov kev liam rau tus neeg siv khoom rau "tuav" nws cov teeb meem yam tsis tau tso tseg. Tab sis nws tsim nyog saib xyuas qhov teeb meem no txhais li cas rau tus neeg uas thov kev pab. Tej zaum "qhov no yog nws tsov rog", muaj peev xwm hais tias "nws xav kom yeej nws tus kheej," nrog koj qhov kev pab tsim nyog. Thiab qhov xwm txheej no, "los daws nws cov teeb meem rau nws" txhais tau tias tsis yog tsuas yog tsis pab, tab sis tseem ua rau muaj kev puas tsuaj, ua rau nws tsis muaj sijhawm los kawm paub daws teeb meem SUCH ntawm nws tus kheej li cas.
Pom zoo:
Dab Tsi Yog Qhov Teeb Meem Nrog Kuv? Cov Cim Ntawm Teeb Meem Lossis Tsuas Yog Xwm Txheej?
Peb cov kev paub thiab kev paub qee zaum nyuaj thiab kim rau peb. Yuav mus qhov twg yog qee yam cuam tshuam, tab sis nws tsis nkag siab kiag li nws yog dab tsi? Kuv nco tau li cas thaum cev xeeb tub kuv tau qhia rau txhua tus paub txog qhov txawv txav hauv lub cev, thiab sim piav qhia nws hauv qee qhov tsis meej pem, tsawg kawg qee yam, vim nws yog thawj zaug kuv tau ntsib nws.
Tus Neeg Tsis Yog Teeb Meem, Teeb Meem Yog Teeb Meem
Cov lus piav qhia ib tus menyuam yaus sib txawv hauv kev kho mob hlwb niaj hnub no thiab kev sab laj txog kev puas siab puas ntsws. Nws tau pib thaum tig ntawm 70-80s ntawm lub xyoo pua XX hauv Australia thiab New Zealand. Tus tsim txoj hauv kev yog Michael White thiab David Epston.
Kev Ntxhov Siab -kev Nyuaj Siab - Paub Txog Qhov Teeb Meem Thiab Kev Daws Teeb Meem
Ob peb lub kaum os ntawm cov teeb meem feem ntau cuam tshuam rau thaj tsam ntawm neuroses, thiab koj twb tau paub koj tus kheej nrog ntau yam hauv kab lus dhau los. Hnub no peb yuav nyob hauv qhov nthuav dav ntawm ib qho ntawm cov kab mob sib kis - kev ntxhov siab -kev nyuaj siab (TDR).
"Teeb Meem" Menyuam - Leej Twg Yog Qhov Teeb Meem No?
Kev sab laj thiab kho nrog cov menyuam ib txwm ua rau muaj kev xav ntau thiab kev txhawj xeeb hauv kuv ntau dua nrog cov neeg siv khoom laus. Thaum cov niam txiv nrhiav tswv yim rau lawv cov menyuam, feem ntau lawv hais tias: "Kuv tus menyuam muaj cov teeb meem zoo li no, kuv puas tuaj yeem ua qee yam txog nws?
Qhov Teeb Meem Ntawm Xaiv Qhov Kev Daws Teeb Meem Zoo Tshaj Plaws Ua Rau Muaj Kev Nyuaj Siab
Qhov teeb meem ntawm kev xaiv kev daws teeb meem tshwm sim los ntawm lub sijhawm ua ntej txhua tus neeg. Tab sis kev ntseeg tias kev xaiv qhov kev txiav txim siab zoo tshaj plaws tuaj yeem ua rau muaj kev sib tham sab hauv tsis kawg thiab lub xeev tsis zoo - kev nyuaj siab, ntxhov siab.
